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Posts archive for: October, 2009
  • Tremble at the Terrific Trini Salesman...

    A young fella from Trinidad moves to Florida and goes to a big everything-under-one-roof department store looking for a job.
    > >
    The Manager says, 'Do you have any sales experience?'
    > >
    The Trini says 'Yeah. I was a salesman back in Trinidad .'

    Well, the boss liked the young fella and decided to give him a job. 'You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did.'
    > >
    His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down. 'How many customers bought something from you today?'
    > >
    The Trini says, 'One.'
    > >
    The boss says, 'Just one? Our sales people average 20 to 30 customers a day. How much was the sale for?'
    > >
    The Trini says, '$101,237.65.'
    > >
    The boss says, '$101,237.65? What the heck did you sell?'
    > >
    The Trini says, 'First, I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium fishhook. Then I sold him a larger fishhook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing, and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department, and I sold him a twin engine Chris Craft. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4x4 Expedition.'
    > >
    The boss said 'A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a BOAT and a TRUCK?'
    > >
    The Trini said 'No dred, the guy came in here to buy Tampons for his wife, and I said, Boss, your weekend done fuked, you might as well go fishing."

  • Murder, Mystery, Intrigue - Trini Style

    A West Indian Soap Opera

    Donovan was on his death bed. His wife Leila was maintaining bedside vigil. She held his fragile hand. Tears ran down her face. Her praying roused him from his slumber.

    He looked up and his pale lips began to move slightly. "Mih dahlin Leila," he whispered. "Hush meh love," she said, "Rest. Shhh...donh talk."

    He was insistent. "Leila" he said, in his tired voice. "I have someting to confess to yuh."

    "Yuh have nuttin to confess." replied the weeping Leila. "Everyting alright, go to sleep meh love."

    "No, no, I have to die in peace love. I sleep wit yuh sister, yuh best friend and yuh mudda."

    "I know," answered Leila, "dats why I poison yuh ass!"

  • Your Worst Halloween Nightmare! Raaaa!

    A man is walking home alone late one foggy Halloween night, when behind him he hears:

    BUMP...

    BUMP...

    BUMP...

    Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.

    BUMP...

    BUMP...

    BUMP...

    Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him.

    FASTER...

    FASTER..

    BUMP...

    BUMP...

    BUMP......

    He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him. However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping.

    clappity-BUMP...

    clappity-BUMP....

    clappity-BUMP...

    on his heels, as the terrified man runs.

    Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, he locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.

    With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.

    Bumping and clapping toward him.

    The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup! Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket... and,

    (hopefully you're ready for this!!!)
    The coffin' stops

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